Scientists Find Oldest Living Animal — Then Kill It

This is really a "no commenter" blog-wise. But I just had to post it, because of the headline:

British marine biologists have found what may be the oldest living animal — that is, until they killed it.

The team from Bangor University in Wales was dredging the waters north of Iceland as part of routine research when the unfortunate specimen, belonging to the clam species Arctica islandica, commonly known as the ocean quahog, was hauled up from waters 250 feet deep.

Only after researchers cut through its shell, which made it more of an ex-clam, and counted its growth rings did they realize how old it had been — between 405 and 410 years old.

Another clam of the same species had been verified at 220 years old, and a third may have lived 374 years. But this most recent clam was the oldest yet.

"Its death is an unfortunate aspect of this work, but we hope to derive lots of information from it," postdoctoral scientist Al Wanamaker told London's Guardian newspaper. "For our work, it's a bonus, but it wasn't good for this particular animal."

This article was lifted from FoxNews.com by Lord Lunch.

The Height of Ludicricity

There is a gem of a quote in Jack Shafer's Slate column October 18th. It's one of those quotes you (meaning me) wish you had had the wit to utter.

The column, entitled The Churchillian Side of Chris Matthews (in which Shafer blisters the thick skin off Matthews's hind-end), cites Vanity Fair's James Wolcott, a man "who appreciates the talents [of Chris Matthews]." In his 2004 book, Attack Poodles and Other Media Mutants, Wolcott writes:

Matthews manages to outrace his contradictory statements by blustering so many excitable things so fast and so often that pinning down the discrepancies is like trying to grab a gust of wind by the tail. He isn't a cynical dissembler. He seems to suffer from some pundit variant of short-term memory loss. Each day on earth erases the days before. He says what he believes and believes what he says, and has the liberating advantage of always working from a blank sheet.

Come to think of it, Matthews is a gust of wind.

- Lord Lunch

Hamsammich Castle, Worcestershiresauce, England

Why Al Really Won the 'Peace Prize'

Your Lordship (moi) takes great pleasure in providing (below) an illuminating excerpt from Adamant wherein the always delightfully perceptive Russell Seitz peels away the p.r. puffery and reveals the hokum that is the Nobel Peace Prize.

- Lord Lunch, Hamsammich Castle, Worcestershiresauce, England

The method of electing the [Nobel Peace Prize] winner ensures a political outcome. Other Nobel prizes are assigned by committees of experts in the orbit of the Swedish Academy of Science, but the Peace Prize winner is determined by a committee reflecting the current strength of Norwegian political parties. Were Norway's anti-immigrant Progress Party to gain a majority, the winner of the Nobel Peace Prize might well be Pat Buchanan.

Will The 2008 Nobel Peace Prize Go To Pat Buchanan ?

The five members of the parliamentary committee to whom Democrat Gore owes his prize include three drawn from the Socialist Left, Labour, and Progressive parties forming Norway's ruling coalition, and one Conservative - a former Minister of Trade. Little wonder Francis Sejersted, past chairman of the committee, admits:

“Awarding a peace prize is, to put it bluntly, a political act.”

And all politics is local. None of the other worthy Peace Prize nominees one might list, from Burmese monks to the embattled opponents of tyranny in Uzbekistan and Zimbabwe, can increase the value of Norway's oil and gas reserves. Giving a prize that amplifies the credibility of the world's foremost advocate of carbon taxes most assuredly can.

Investing $750,000 in Al's power to pontificate on behalf of his carbon trading business could pay Norway and OPEC handsomely. The return could exceed a million to one, since Al's crusade to double coal's cost by taxation should translate into far higher prices for the lower carbon North Sea oil and gas that are the mainstay of the Norwegian economy. Oslo stands to gain hundreds of billions of Euros on its multi-billion barrel reserves, a truly extraordinary return on a one kilogram disc of gold.

So my congratulations to Mr. Gore, and kudos to the Oslo committee, whom I hereby place in nomination for the Nobel Prize in Economics for awarding the Peace Prize to Al.

Their decision is in the best Viking fiscal tradition, but avoids the recrimination that so often attends rapine, pillage, looting and burning. Especially the last -- nowadays, a Viking's loot might not cover his carbon offsets.

Search for Kidnapped US Soldier in Iraq Delayed 10 Hours by FISA Law

And Democrats in Congress are determined to extend that law in a vote later this week.

Excerpt from the New York Post, Oct. 15, 2007:

Sometime before dawn, heavily armed al Qaeda gunmen quietly cut through the tangles of concertina wire surrounding the outpost of two Humvees and made a massive and coordinated surprise attack.

Four of the soldiers were killed on the spot and three others were taken hostage.

A search to rescue the men was quickly launched. But it soon ground to a halt as lawyers - obeying strict U.S. laws about surveillance - cobbled together the legal grounds for wiretapping the suspected kidnappers.

Starting at 10 a.m. on May 15, according to a timeline provided to Congress by the director of national intelligence, lawyers for the National Security Agency met and determined that special approval from the attorney general would be required first.

For an excruciating nine hours and 38 minutes, searchers in Iraq waited as U.S. lawyers discussed legal issues and hammered out the "probable cause" necessary for the attorney general to grant such "emergency" permission.

Finally, approval was granted and, at 7:38 that night, surveillance began.

"The intelligence community was forced to abandon our soldiers because of the law," a senior congressional staffer with access to the classified case told The Post.

"How many lawyers does it take to rescue our soldiers?" he asked. "It should be zero."

The FISA law applies even to a cellphone conversation between two people in Iraq, because those communications zip along wires through U.S. hubs, which is where the taps are typically applied.

U.S. officials had no way of knowing if Jimenez and his fellow soldiers were still alive during the nearly 10-hour delay.

The body of one was found a few weeks later in the Euphrates River and the terror group Islamic State of Iraq - an al Qaeda offshoot - later claimed in a video that Jimenez and the third soldier had been executed and buried.

I say there ought to be a law! Oh, wait . . . .

Tennessee law enforcement is a smoke screen for fascism

Tennessee Department of Revenue agents are under orders to stop Tennessee motorists who have in their vehicles "large quantities of cigarettes" purchased out of state.

How will the 'Revenooers' know the cigs were purchased out of state? Easy-peasey.

Tennessee is dispatching under-cover agents to stake out stores selling cigarettes along interstate highways near the Tennessee border. When an agent spots someone with Tennessee tags buying cigarettes 'in volume' at a store in any one of the eight states bordering Tennessee, a radio call is made to a revenue officer who stops the car when it enters Tennessee.

And what happens then?

The stoppee, the schmuck whose car is weighted down with "large quantities of cigarettes," is arrested for bringing untaxed cigarettes into the state.

What is a large quantity of cigarettes, exactly?

More than two cartons, exactly. Namely, two cartons and one pack.

Toting untaxed cigarettes exceeding two cartons in measure is a Class B misdemeanor, punishable by up to six months in the pokey and/or a $500 fine.

Oh, a further little punishment may also be meted out, entirely at the arresting officer's discretion. Vehicles used to transport more than two cartons may be seized, since they are deemed contraband.

Now, you can bring up to 24 cartons and 9 packs into the state and get off with six months in the pokey, a fine of $500 bucks, and perhaps see your brand new used Buick hauled away to the auctioneer. But if you cross that "Welcome to Tennessee" line with just one pack more, 25 cartons in toto, you'll wish you were an illegal alien instead of a poor sap who likes his 'backy.

Bringing 25 or more cartons into Tennessee is a Class E felony. The punishment is a minimum of one year in prison (the maximum is six years) plus a fine of up to $3,000.

And, agents have been ordered to seize any vehicle carrying more than 25 cartons of cigarettes without Tennessee tax stamps.

Why has cigarette transport into Tennessee become a matter for the Gestapo?

On July 21, Tennessee’s cigarette tax jumped 40 cents, to 62 cents per pack. All eight states bordering Tennessee have lower tax rates, ranging from 17 cents in Missouri upwards. That means one carton (10 packs) is $4.50 cheaper in Missouri. Twenty-five cartons purchased in the Show Me state saves someone from the Volunteer State $112.50.

Is there, Dear Reader, a lesson to be drawn from this dreary dispatch? You betchum.

Proving Colombia University's Bollinger is a fool (as if proof were needed)

This news report from the Islamic Republic News Agency is quoted verbatim to demonstrate the damage done by Columbia's propaganda gift to Mahmoud Bonaparte.

Columbia President Lee Bollinger (who allows no ROTC on campus, nor steps forward to defend conservatives who are denied the same privilege enjoyed by the Iranian snipe) felt pressured to show his manhood by spitting a few verbal poniards at the guest speaker. But Mahmoud got what he wanted.

Glimpse the following report and ponder: jihadists must be heartened to know their little hero plays so well among the American rabble, er, elitists. And jihadists so heartened are less inhibited in their plans against the USA.

So, without further huffery puffery, here follows what jihadists throughout the Islamic world will read as they butter their breakfast muffins this morning.

- Lord Lunch, Hamsammich Castle, Worcestershiresauce, England

Despite entire US media objections, negative propagation and hue and cry in recent days over IRI President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad's scheduled address at Colombia University, he gave his lecture and answered students questions here on Monday afternoon.

On second day of his entry in New York, and amid standing ovation of the audience that had attended the hall where the Iranian President was to give his lecture as of early hours of the day, Ahmadinejad said that Iran is not going to attack any country in the world.

Before President Ahamadinejad's address, Colombia University Chancellor in a brief address told the audience that they would have the chance to hear Iran's stands as the Iranian President would put them forth.

He said that the Iranians are a peace loving nation, they hate war, and all types of aggression.

Referring to the technological achievements of the Iranian nation in the course of recent years, the president considered them as a sign for the Iranians' resolute will for achieving sustainable development and rapid advancement.

The audience on repeated occasion applauded Ahmadinejad when he touched on international crises.

At the end of his address President Ahmadinejad answered the students' questions on such issues as Israel, Palestine, Iran's nuclear program, the status of women in Iran and a number of other matters.

IRI President addresses students at Colombia University - Irna

A Distasteful Foretaste of HillaryCare

Wife gets apology over dying cancer patient's 8-month wait to see doctor

Lyndsay Moss - The Scotsman (lmoss@scotsman.com)

HEALTH bosses have been told to apologize to the wife of a cancer patient who was left waiting eight months to see a doctor.

Pauline Cheasley said her late husband Maurice's follow-up appointment was canceled twice by Stirling Royal Infirmary. When he was finally seen by a doctor, he was told his cancer was inoperable. He died eight months later, in March last year.